Devotional - Speak to the heart

“Man looks on the outside appearance but God looks on the heart” 1 Samuel 16:7

Message:

We have all been there…  

Your loved ones are tense, winding others up, loud, agitated, disruptive or alternatively completely withdrawn, and you can feel that a full scale meltdown is on the way. 

You try all the normal techniques, 

changing the subject,

distraction, 

but nothing works.  

Now you yourself are getting agitated as the volume gets higher and nothing you are doing is working and you start to feel powerless.  

The following is an alternative to super sensory techniques, that can sometimes work and is worth a try.  

Speak to the heart rather than the behaviour.

Firstly, think about what your loved ones are just about to do or have just done - is it a new club they are going to, or an unusual event?

Try to work out what the underlying cause of all the noise and agitation is. 

Then try speaking directly to that anxiety and fear.

Ignore the disruptive noise and tension. 

For instance, if your child is about to go to tennis club, and you know that they aren’t very confident at trying new things, you could say, ‘you are good at tennis, you are going to do really well today’. Ignore their verbal response but notice the general emotional atmosphere in the room. Is your barometer going down or up?   

If nothing changes, think again about what the underlying cause of the behaviour could be and speak directly to it with encouragement and affirmation.

If there is a sudden change in atmosphere, then you have hit the nail on the head. 

Point to ponder:

How much are you judging the words that are said and actions done rather than discerning the heart?

Prayer:

“Dear Heavenly Father, thank you that you know us so well that you see right into who we are and how we are. Thank you that there is no point in trying to be anything but genuine before you and others. Help me to see that when others around me are struggling that I can take a step back to see what else might be going on and not judge the behaviour directly. Give me your Holy Spirit inspired insight today please Lord. Thank you, Amen!”